2.9.12


Why do you fear the rage in my eyes?
Why do you quell when you look at me now?
I remember when the only image
You would have seen in my eyes
Was you
Pure, unblemished, perfect.
A reflection of you cast in my soul and framed in my eyes

Now all I feel is blank
I see you standing there
I still see you
But I don’t feel you
I don’t contain you
And painfully
I don’t understand you

Every time you call my name
My heart beats a little faster
In fear.  Not elation
Every time we pass each other
Mumbled politeness
When once you knew secrets
I was afraid to tell myself

I thought we were meant to be
That our rhythms were cast in tandem
That the world could never trip me up
Because you would never let go

I was wrong
I wish every day I wasn’t
I feel like a phoenix
Dying in the hope of being reborn

But all you do,
Is sweep up the ashes
And trash them.
No being reborn for me

I wish you’d just let me burn
In eternal agonizing brilliance
That torture must be less
Than looking at you now
And seeing someone 
I no longer recognize

2 comments:

$unshine of the Moon said...

Powerful piece, precise in expressions, complex in emotions. How well you have used the concept of phoenix rising from it's ashes!
Welcome back!

huckleberry friend said...

So much of anguish unleashed with whole lot of power...stirred up something deep...